Writing Workshop: Day 2, Body Paragraphs 1 and 2
In today's class, we will be workshopping our first two body paragraphs for our next portfolio (a research essay using secondary sources to analyze Aldous Huxley's Brave New World, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, Truman Capote's In Cold Blood, and Chinua Achebe's Things Fall Apart).
Bring four copies of your first two body paragraphs to class today. Hand three copies out (one for each group member) and keep one for yourself. (Note: If you are in a group of five, pass the fourth copy to your fourth group member.)
Writing Workshop Instructions:
1) Get into groups of four (with one group of five). Yes, we will use the magic sorting dinosaurs!
2) Write your name on top of the draft.
3) Read each paragraph in front of you, check spelling, punctuation, word choice, and grammar.
4) Also check for comprehension. Does the paragraph make sense?
5) Check for engagement: do the body paragraphs engage you? Do you want to read more?
6) Lastly, write two things you like about the body paragraphs.
7) Write two things you think the writer should work on.
8) Repeat steps 1-7 for each paper.
9) At the end, give the writer feedback as a group so s/he can take notes and discuss.
Writing Reflection:
At the end of today's workshop, please reply to this post in the comments section below. Reflect on what you learned during your workshop and what you need to focus on when revising your essay.
I need to focus on transitions and word choice.
ReplyDeleteI need focus on my wording, and grammar overall. I also learned that I need to pay closer attention to what I write, as well as not repeating words as much.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to revise my transitions into new topics. I need to work on providing more examples for my claims to strengthen them. I also need to expand some of my quotes to truly back up my argument.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to make sure my ideas flow throughout my essay. I also learned that I should try to make sure I do not repeat the same words throughout my paragraphs.
ReplyDeleteIn today's writing workshop, I learned that I should focus on expanding my level one analysis when writing, as I usually gloss over it to get to the more in-depth analysis, which could leave readers confused. Additionally, "this" seems to be one of my favorite words.
ReplyDeleteI need to focus on my citations and bringing my points back to my thesis. I'm also going to work on structure a little, and fix some typos and grammatical errors.
ReplyDeleteFrom our discussions today, and even just rereading my paragraphs a few times, I learned that I need to focus on my thesis more, and probably find better examples. Talking to other people helped me get new ideas on how to improve certain parts that I was really unsure of and point out problems I hadn't seen
ReplyDeleteFor quotes, I need to remember to analyze before and after.
ReplyDeleteFor me, I need to work on my wording and topic sentences. I also need to introduce the author of my other sources before I jump into what they say about my topic
ReplyDeleteI learned about specific rules like 19th vs nineteenth and need to revise some minor capitalization stuff as well as punctuation.
ReplyDeleteToday I learned that I am very very slow while looking over other people's papers, and due to this, that I don't need to always cover literally every aspect of everything. Something I need to look out for in my own writing is jumping to conclusions, since I frequently neglect to assume that audience knows nothing. From the suggestions I've received, this is the primary thing that I need to work on, along with some minor errors that caught me up along the way.
ReplyDeleteI really need to fix the time tenses in my essay. All verbs talking about Frankenstein should be in present tense. And some sentences and words I choose are awkward and should be changed. The fluency and clearness are not enough, too.
ReplyDeleteI need to work on making sure I include a full analysis of my quotes, especially level three. I also need to work on the organization of my body paragraphs and figure out which order would work the best based on the content. I also need to cite my sources when talking about specifics that you would only know from the article and paraphrasing. Also my phrasing sometimes can be unclear.
ReplyDeleteMostly I need to work on word choice and phrasing. Additionally, I need to expand my analysis of some of the quotes. I still need to introduce "In Cold Blood" in my introduction.
ReplyDeleteI need to shorten my essay, and pull out the important information with less filler.
ReplyDeleteIn today's workshop, I learned that I wasn't making my points clear enough. I need to focus on being less repetitive and develop more on my points.
ReplyDeleteI need to focus on my MLA format for quotes and my leveled analysis. I learned about several grammatical mistakes that were made by both my group and I, and how to be a better writer because of it.
ReplyDeleteI need to analyze my secondary quotes more. I need to tie my points into the thesis better, especially if it is being discussed in multiple paragraphs of my essay.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to be more specific that the first part of my essay is about Dick alone. I should address that I am not discussing Perry for a reason, and that I will be mentioning him later. There are also some phrases that I could explain better. Lastly, from looking at others' work, I learned ways I could analyze some of my quotes in a more effective way.
ReplyDeleteI need to work on some problems with my grammar and remember to cite paraphrasing. I should also read me essay aloud before printing it off.
ReplyDeleteFrom this workshop, I learned that I need to properly connect my writing to my thesis as well as refrain from repeating the same idea.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to work on clarity, repetition, and word choice when I write.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to focus on my wording and the overall flow of the ideas in my paper. I also did not make the points of my paragraphs clear enough and I should elaborate more in the intro of each paragraph.
ReplyDeleteFrom this workshop, I learned that I need to focus on quote structure (specifically block quotes), and that I should lengthen my analysis portions of my paragraphs.
ReplyDeleteI need to work on forming better topic sentences, and I need to try and be less repetitive in my writing. In addition to that, I need to work on properly formatting my essay, and I need to be more clear with my points.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to have stronger topic sentences and some good transitions. I also need to change long quotes to block quotes.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to work on clarifying some of the points I bring up, and using better word choice (specifically other words in place of "this").
ReplyDeleteI need to focus on not being to repetitive in my essay and to check for 1st and 2nd person pronouns. I also need to work on shortening my paragraphs.
ReplyDeleteI believe I need to focus mainly on small issues, such as some wording and sentence order. There was also some redundancy in repeating the name or author of a source.
ReplyDeleteI need to organize my quote introductions better
ReplyDeleteI learned that in some areas, not all elements included in my topic sentence were addressed in my body paragraphs. I will need to focus on adding clear introductions to my secondary sources and hitting on all parts of the paragraph topic while I am revising.
ReplyDeleteI need to be more clear while making my points and work on my grammar.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to work on using more precise wording. In addition, I need to focus on being less repetitive. While revising, I will focus on these elements.
ReplyDeleteIn my writing I need to make sure that I am addressing all counter arguments, especially when my thesis goes against common opinion. It would also help to be a little less long-winded in my writing and to shorten my sentences to a more manageable level for the reader.
ReplyDeleteIn today's workshop, I learned that I need to organize my points in a manner that flows better. I also need to tie my paragraph in more with my thesis, because instead of focusing on the American Dream, I talked mainly on Perry's dream and didn't tie it in with my thesis.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to sound more sure of my point. My peer editors would point out every time I said "this must have done that" or "they probably did this." I need to word them more like "this did that" and "they did this"
ReplyDeleteI need to work on some typographical errors and word choice. I also need to smooth out the paper and make it less choppy.
ReplyDeleteI need to work on my repetitive phrasing and more explanation of quotes.
ReplyDeleteI learned that I need to work on making my analysis less repetitive, and that it pays to proofread.
ReplyDeleteI need to elaborate more in my analysis and make sure to connect to the thesis.
ReplyDelete